Today was my last run in Arizona. I've been here since Friday night to be with my Grandfather, Frank, as he was in hospice care. He passed away late on Sunday night after a long battle with emphysema. In the end, he was fighting for breath, something I would never wish on anyone.
I was running four miles on the treadmill really struggling today. It was just hard to get strength to my legs and to catch my breath. Every time I took a really deep breath, I thought of him and how I wish I could have just given him my lungs at the end. That probably sounds pretty stupid. Who can watch a loved one suffer and not want to ease their pain, or take it away, or take it in their place?
I am fortunate. My family has much love to give and many great memories of our life together. That is what will push me to go the distance. Knowing that I have a big group of people who believe in me as much as I believe in myself. Please, hug your family and tell them that you love them.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Care for yourself to care for others
This week in running started out strong with a good six-mile run on the track. Unlike the six-mile run the week before in Chicago, traversing slush and traffic, I did not feel like I was going to die. That's always a plus.
Tuesday was a four-mile day and back on the treadmill. With a very short window of time, I had to kick it into high gear with a steady four miles at 5.5. At least my stamina with increased speeds is improving.
Wednesday was supposed to be another four, but I chose instead to have dinner with friends. That was a tough decision knowing that it would put me a total of 19 miles behind on my schedule. But, if there's anything that this training is teaching me, it is to pace myself through life. That means taking mini breaks when necessary to actually LIVE. What a concept.
Thursday was three miles on the treadmill and again at a pace of 5.5 miles per hour. Nothing special.
Friday, I hopped a plane to come to Arizona to help care for my Grandfather and give support to my Grandmother. I know that being a good caregiver also requires giving care to oneself. This prompted me to continue with my training runs and to push it a bit in honor of those who may never have that opportunity again. If we can, we should. One mile at 5.5, one at 5.6, and one at 5.7. This little run was one way to honor my Grandpa, a person who taught me how to laugh at myself. I love you.
Miles run to date: 165.2
Deficit from plan: -19 miles
Lessons learned: It's okay to deviate from the plan as long as you can still see the road.
Tuesday was a four-mile day and back on the treadmill. With a very short window of time, I had to kick it into high gear with a steady four miles at 5.5. At least my stamina with increased speeds is improving.
Wednesday was supposed to be another four, but I chose instead to have dinner with friends. That was a tough decision knowing that it would put me a total of 19 miles behind on my schedule. But, if there's anything that this training is teaching me, it is to pace myself through life. That means taking mini breaks when necessary to actually LIVE. What a concept.
Thursday was three miles on the treadmill and again at a pace of 5.5 miles per hour. Nothing special.
Friday, I hopped a plane to come to Arizona to help care for my Grandfather and give support to my Grandmother. I know that being a good caregiver also requires giving care to oneself. This prompted me to continue with my training runs and to push it a bit in honor of those who may never have that opportunity again. If we can, we should. One mile at 5.5, one at 5.6, and one at 5.7. This little run was one way to honor my Grandpa, a person who taught me how to laugh at myself. I love you.
Miles run to date: 165.2
Deficit from plan: -19 miles
Lessons learned: It's okay to deviate from the plan as long as you can still see the road.
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